Monday, July 6, 2009

Episode 8 - Honey for Nothing ........... Part 2

Disclaimer: This episode is a sequel , and it won't make sense unless you read the previous part. Ummm..... that doesn't mean I guarantee that it'll still make sense !

Wattaa weeeek !! Wattaa weeeek !! Unbelievable incidences . Immensely ironic occurrences . WOW ! My life's a 'reality TV show' !! But I'll come to it later .......

Going by the ending of the previous episode you would've expected me to describe my 'quest' to obtain the internet connection I desperately needed. Well, I'm really sorry to disappoint you, but matter of fact is that I got the connection in just a few days without much fuss.

As I said , I got my intern in a company , most importantly , a start-up company. Before you ponder upon the 'most-importantly' part -- lemme clarify. There are certain advantages of working in a start-up :
1.Timings are flexible.
2.You don't have to wear a stupid ID card which your friends really love to 'play' with and comment at.
3.It's OK to wear informals. As long as you don't dress like Elvis Presley you are fine.
4.There's no compulsion, whatsoever, to SHAVE DAILY. I dunno about other guys, but the violence and bloodshed is just too much for me.

Work started immediately, and there was a rather conspicuous decrease in enthu of my project-partner cum batchmate in just a few days. It made me wonder,if my uncanny ability to 'put peace' does, actually, have an inductive effect on others working with me. But it turned out that the process had nothing to do with me. In fact, he was just being an IITian – no big deal!!

My company was placed in a nice locality, with notably quiet surroundings. There was a child-day-care center right opposite to my workplace (so now you know – I was jokin about the “quiet” surroundings). I once came across a woman, who appeared really hesitant to admit her child there. And that's when I noticed the name-board there . In big, bold letters, was written the name of the place ---- PMS , and below it was the tag-line --- “Not just babysitting!!” (:D) . In case you didn't understand her hesitation , wiki 'PMS' and refer to the first article in the list .

Our company didn't provide lunch. Instead they gave us “snacks” , which included samosa, cheese-sandwich , etc. (I don't blame you for getting jealous thr..)! So , we had to hunt around for good lunch houses. Subsequently, we stumbled upon a Chinese-cuisine place, which provided quite decent food – and also took pains to hire people from Assam,Sikkim,etc as waiters ..... you know........, so that the place gets a “Chinese” look. They really have to be appreciated for their dedication and thoughtfulness !!! Of course, once, we were unlucky enough to run into a couple going through with a divorce, seated in the adjacent table, who just couldn't keep their freakin' voices down . The conversation was something on expected lines:

Woman :: It's MY way or No way....

Moron(Ex-Husband) :: Okay, anything you say !!

Woman :: What are you doing with all that money ?? Spend some for child-care, and whatever's left , I'll take it....

Moron :: (Realising, ex-wife is talking abt money) You look beautiful today !!!!
and so on and so forth !!!

Must say...... each and everyday was quite eventful. I got accommodation in a really peaceful PG(paying guest house) . Of course, “peaceful” has it's own connotations........... more on it later . Quite mentionable, was the presence of a dog there. It's name was Tommy, but i suggested, to the caretaker, that naming him “Shah Rukh” would be more apt. Obviously, now I can't claim that I had nothing to do with its naming . The dog seems to like me . In fact, as i write this post Shah Rukh is licking my feet .................................. wait................................... well, it's chewing my feet now!!!!! GTG!!!!

P.S: Not all Moms take 'marriage jokes' lightly!!!! This was a conversation that took place a few days ago :
Mom :: Can you go buy some sugar ?
Moron(Me!!) :: Ok Maa......
(After 30 mins as i got up to go to the store)
Mom :: I got the sugar myself . You have become really lazy nowadays !
Moron ::Well, at least that way I'm completely prepared for married life ..... hehe.....

I'm going to abstain from describing the scene that followed , 'cause it was really gruesome ! In short, Mom went on about how my Dad has the 'same' attitude and how it's not healthy...blah.....blah...... :(

P.P.S: I put up a counter just to ensure/confirm that no one reads my blog! But to my utter dismay, quite a few DO read it . Now I can't publish watever I want, I feel a peculiar responsibility to censor my episodes.... :(

P.P.P.S: Please wait for the explanation for the title of this 'Honey for Nothing' series ......

P.P.P.P.S: Now that Delhi High court has decriminalised homosexuality --- I don't want any guy comin' to me and saying “You must be happy, since it's ok to be gay in India now” or any other possible version of this stupid remark. This so called 'joke' has already become repetitive and boooooooooring.

P.P.P.P.P.S: Ummm ......... I think I've overdone the 'P.S' part . What do you think??!!

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Episode 7 - Honey for Nothing......Part 1

Disclaimer: Due to recession - the quality&quantity of my postings have come down . So , don't get your expectations too high up(hey Dhoni!! You cud probably use this excuse for the time being??!!).

One of my 'friends', questioned me a few weeks back as to why i had stopped blogging (and according to the automatic English dictionary provided by 'blogging' is NOT an English word!!! Sheesh !! Gibb max!!) . My initial reaction, of course,was that of shock , considering the fact that he actually gave a crap about the blog!! I responded , saying that the blog brought out a sarcastic and frivolous side of me , which made me uncomfortable (hard to believe , eh??). He , in turn , suggested (Yes! He was jobless/pathetic enough to have SUGGESTIONS regarding my blog!) that it might actually turn out to be a 'hit' like the “Fake IPL Player” slog (I prefer to call it a 'slog' instead of a blog because .....DUH!!...... it's about cricket). That,combined with (silly)inspiration drawn from the Australian cricket team's unexpected exit,kinda materialized into this post .

A pretty long intro, i guess? Well , I have been in Bangalore,only around a month or so, for my intern . And i could probably write a whole book on my experiences here , already . But , of course ,being a faithful IITian , i decided to put 'em in my blog instead .

I was supposed to do my intern with a certain company , but unfortunately things didn't work out as expected . The worst part of being left jobless was that i got to know abt this only after i reached Bangalore . So, i booked train tickets to Chennai , and , subsequently , got into a resume-mailing spree to find an intern in a Bangalore company. Fortunately , one of my dept. Intern reps(IRs) , kinda volunteered to help me in this situation . I only let a few of my friends know about this , since i knew going around mentioning the company's name, and it's lil mix-up, wudn't be ethical . But, quite ironically, he forwarded my mail , in which this whole fiasco was explained, to the whole department's google-group instead of the IR-team google-group!! Nevertheless , he and one other batch-mate of mine , helped me end up with an intern (Thanx Diki&Chunda !!) .

Initially , i was quite apprehensive about it,as the job i got wasn't exactly in my area of interest . Later , realising that it was a paid intern, i convinced myself "All is well , that FUNDS well" ..... eh?

Once my intern was confirmed , i came back from the cyber-cafe to my paying-guest-house(PG , as i am goin to refer to it as) and felt quite relieved . “Peaceful summer ahead ” was my line of thought . Still, something constantly irked me . Deep inside my heart , i knew i was missing something really close to me . As i opened my laptop , it suddenly struck me ........

“Crap!! No NET connection in my room!!!”

(To be contd...................)

P.S: The relevance to the title will be explained in one of the subsequent posts . I am pretty sure this is the last thing u'll be bothered about . Still , i feel responsible for what i write here......